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Toys

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Updated 12/01 [F] On Cock Rings- I have tried a few different types, they don't do much for me. The stimulus is mostly the feeling of a "grip" around the base of your cock and behind the scrotum which is more arousing to some than others. I don't think increase in longevity was really noticable in my case. The theory is it restricts blood flow OUT of the penis which keeps it hard. The distraction of wearing a cock ring can cause a man to take longer to come in some cases, but I think for the most part it is psychological. No harm in trying!!!!!!!

[F] Re: cock rings. They work - after a fashion. Save money and get a variety of thick o-rings (that's what they are anyway) from the local hardware store. You have to get them rolled onto the penis before a full erection, otherwise it's just too difficult. Best solution; Viagra. Best invention since sliced bread.
Re: vibrating egg. I think I saw the remote-control version in the Adam & Eve catalog.

[M 27] I have used metal cock rings and leather cock straps/ball seperators. A strap is safer, because it can be more easily removed. They are also easier to but on. A cock ring/strap fastens behind the balls, so a rigid ring can only be squeezed into when flacid. Doing something so blatantly sexually-related always starts to arouse me and a metal ring is hard to get on fast enough. A tight cock ring/strap is SPECTACULAR. It traps blood in the penis, making it much thicker, more rigid and more sensitive. If sized right, it should make your cock throb, without being painful. It also constricts the testicles a little (a LOT with a ball seperator) which can cause twinges when they bang into things during sex. [This is just an added benefit if you like a little ball squeezing, though]. My wife often squeals when I put one on - it feel liek a totally different penis during sex. I don't know that they prevent ! ejaculation any, but they do reduce the liklihood that I will lose an erection prior to (and usually, I won't lose one after ejaculating - unless something ruins the mood, or I take it off)
About the vibrating egg - Try Stockroom.com (if they don't have it, they are great people and will help you get one)

[F] The cock ring seems to work. We purchased one a few years ago from Eve’s Garden. My husband enjoys using it and feels that it does make him feel harder and stay harder longer although he has no difficulty staying hard….much to my happiness!

Updated 4/01 [M] In the early years of our marriage (now 26+ yrs), my wife thought she would never resort to/enjoy toys, but she changed her mind before long. At first she experimented with the simple, cheap plastic bullet-shaped vibrators, and although they got her off, they don't last long and crap out. From there she went to the rabbit-type vibrators; the ones with the separate clit stimulator, rotating shaft and internal beads. She really liked those, but found they didn't last long either, and we couldn't justify the cost of a Sybian; a very $$ saddle-type mechanism. Well, she found out she liked penetration with the soft jelly cocks over the harder latex ones, then she discovered the Eroscillator!! This well-made masturbator is no toy!! It's a little pricey ($90) but it's built for the long haul. Instead of just vibrating, the head oscillates like an electric toothbrush and quietly (note, ladies). The first one we bought has lasted 10 years and it's still kicking! She recently bought a new updated model (same price) only because the detents on the 3-speed switch were getting worn and it would slide into high speed on her, and she says she always gets off with low speed alone. The newer model comes with a longer, detachable cord, and a ribbed body so it's easier to hold if your hands are full of lube or pussy juices. Her favorite technique is to lay it on the right side of her clit, on her favorite sweet spot and let it do its thing. She likes the Eroscillator so much, she said she could sell them door-to-door! Once she met another woman who owned one, and she loved hers, too. Ladies, my wife encourages you to check one out today!

Updated 2/1/00 [F 51] The ben wa balls with strings attached really work. When you place them in your vagina and rock back and forth with your knees up you can feel a slight stimulation. I like walking around the house wearing them for up to 15 minutes because they strengthen the PC muscle. Basically the longer you wear them the stronger the muscle becomes. Or wear them on a car trip, do kegel exercises while wearing them.
Also play with them, tug on the string while you are trying to pull them out. Basically they teach vaginal control and help with bladder control.
They are also cheaper than the bladder control devices that are sold for $100 and you insert in your vagina, but they don't roll around as nicely as ben wa balls do.
I had a wonderful lover suggest that I use them and they heighten sensitivity and control. I love them!

Updated 1/1/00 [M 33] I bought a vibrator for my wife a few years ago (you know the type - a little 5" hard plastic bullet) and she promptly put it in the back of her nightstand. This summer when she was on a business trip, I decided to take it out, put in a fresh battery, slide a condom on, lube it up, and slip it in my back door while I masturbated... when I turned it on I exploded! Since then, I bought a jelly anal vibrator, and I'm hooked. I like the feel of the little probe, but when the vibrations start, I can't control myself. If you guys like a little pressure on your prostate during sex, this is the same only MUCH better.

Updated 12/5/99 [M 37] I want to add to your list of men who enjoy stimulation with vibrators. I started out using candles while masturbating many years ago. I finally summoned the courage to buy a vibrator under the auspices of pleasing my previous wife. But I think I wanted it more for myself than her, although she did enjoy it at times during our sex sessions.
My current wife and I now have two different vibrators, both of which I purchased. I haven't told her yet how much I enjoy reaming my ass with these while masturbating. She is still somewhat inhibited and I'm not sure how she would react. Our largest vibrator is 9" long and 2" at its widest point with thick veins, which I now am able to take somewhat easily. The orgasms I have while stroking this in and out of my ass are unbelievable!
One of my greatest fantasies is to have her take me with a strap-on. I have absolutely no interest in having another man fuck me, but I nearly melt at the thought of having my wife strap on a large member and bend me over for some serious strokes while she pleasures herself at the same time with another vibrator. I'm hard at the mere thought!

[M 33] I bought a vibrator for my wife a few years ago (you know the type - a little 5" hard plastic bullet) and she promptly put it in the back of her nightstand. This summer when she was on a business trip, I decided to take it out, put in a fresh battery, slide a condom on, lube it up, and slip it in my back door while I masturbated... when I turned it on I exploded! Since then, I bought a jelly anal vibrator, and I'm hooked. I like the feel of the little probe, but when the vibrations start, I can't control myself. If you guys like a little pressure on your prostate during sex, this is the same only MUCH better.

Updated 11/1/99 [F] We are a very happily married couple who just recently explored the use of sex-toys during our love-making. This is all new to us, and we both like it a great deal. As any woman would know, oral sex is great, but when you add vaginal stimulation in the form of a dildo, I'm in heaven. We have tried only a few toys, one being a 6" vibrator and the other a 10" vibrating dildo that I got for my birthday from my co-workers. Both are wonderful toys and we enjoy them. Depending on the mood, we will use the vibrator with my husband's tongue to bring me to the ultimate, but other times when I want to absolutey devour my husband we use the big thing. I am not a big woman, but when I get aroused I go wild and am able to take the whole 10" in me! Jesus, Mary and Joseph but it feels good.

I was interested to read about this month's email from a lady who had been given a huge dildo. I have always fancied using a huge dildo in a power fantasy situation. We very occasionally have a mild bondage session (almost invariably I tie her) but I often loose the erection in the process of making sure she is both secured and comfortable. (Maybe I make too much of her comfort?) I would love the opportunity to screw her mercilessly with a big dill which filled and stretched her. (I did once, a long time ago, I surprised her by using a peeled cucumber in her, and her orgasm was explosive!) The act of screwing her with a dildo or vibrator has usually caused a rejuvenation of my erection which we then use, though she often rejects the dildo unless really aroused.

[M 31] I met a friend once in NY. Me and her had been talking for a long while and decided to meet. Now this was my first experience with toys (vibrators really) and it was amazing. Not using it on her or watching her use it on herself...but what she did to me with it.
Now fellas, I am not into it going up my butt or anything, but the feel of it it vibrating on me while her warm mouth surrounded me was like mind boggling. The feel of it vibrating and her taking me was just ohhh, get chills thinking of it. And she knew what she was doing too...believe me she did..
So when guys say they can't have toys in there homes...I laugh at you, don't think of it as a toy. think of it as an extension to her and your pleasure...

Updated 10/1/99 [F ] I am a very happily married woman who with my husband have a very good sex-life. Recently I received a very large and thick dildo from my co-workers for my birthday. At the time it was very funny and very outrageous.
My husband and I love to perform oral-sex on each other, and one night after we had been to a wedding dance, and drinking, I decided to try it out. The "thing" was very -very big and viberated. I figured that it was made for someone, otherwise they wouldn't make them. I am not that big of a woman, only average but what the hell!
My husband did his magic with his tongue on my clitoris and boobs while I eased the big toy into me. I know that this is not true masterbation, but everyone should try this combination of things. WOW!!!!! Jesus, Mary and Joseph it was great! The "thing" that I thought was way to big for me fit like a glove and I greatly enjoyed it. But after a long session of this during which I climaxed numerous times the best was yet to come. My husband stopped, kissed me most passionately and then entered me and I exploded. That was and will forever be the best of our sessions.

I previously commented at not finding any pleasure in ben wha balls. A reader responded JEL [F 47] I am writing this to concur with your comment re Ben Wa balls....I have the kind with the prickly latex cover, and still no stimulation until they are pulled out, which is verrrry nice! I guess we have to accept the fact that , physiologically, the vagina is not designed for that kind of stimulation.

Updated 9/3/99 [M 42] We just received an order from Adam & Eve. In it was the "butterfly" vibrator, strap on for the woman, non penetrating. We giggled a little at the awkward task of strapping it on my lady, but when it was in place and turned on, so was she! The very intense vibrations jolted her, as she repositioned it for maximum pleasure, I sucked and played with her breasts. In a short time she was bucking and squirming, I sucked harder while my hands roamed all over. I can't remember her having such an intense orgasm, she came and came, and I never let up playing with her breasts and touching her. WE LIKE THE PURPLE BUTTERFLY!!! I couldn't wait for her to remove it (straps and all) so I just lifted it so I could enter her while it was still buzzing. It was a great feeling pumping her wet pussy while the butterfly was still humming against my cock. My lover will testify this is designed for ladies, and despite the straps, it is a great sex toy! The ability to turn attention to other spots with the "no hands" feature while the toy is working is a great advantage. They claim it can be worn under clothing.......we can't wait to try that!!!!
I wrote back that I hadn't been too thrilled by the butterfly he mentioned and he replied:
M [42] continued Hi-recently we corresponded about the "butterfly" vibrator my lady and I purchased, and you said you had tried it with lackluster results, but considered giving it another shot after reading about our experiences. We put it away for a week or so after our initial experience, and the second time proved to be very hot also. I noticed an updated version of the butterfly which includes a short penis, found while browsing sextoyworld.com. that looks like it could be fun.
Anyway, back to my story. Included in our current mail order was a "newsletter", basically stories, info-articles, etc. It included an article on Chinese anal love beads, a woman's experience when she brought them home to her husband who thoroughly enjoyed the affair. We have tried the love beads before, and though I enjoyed them, it wasn't earth shattering. My mate seemed to appreciate them more, I'd keep tugging on them lightly while eating her pussy, until I can feel her start to buck, then I start pulling hard enough to pop them out one at a time. The beads have ended in the back of the "love drawer" for awhile, but after reading this hot article describing another couples version of the beads, we "pulled them out" (pun intended) of the toy box for another go, and I'll tell you what!! Something was just right this time, she pulled them out during my orgasm and I came so hard I thought I would turn inside out. The true benefits of sharing sexual experiences with others. We have gotten into toys lately, and am eager to see responses from other toy users.

[F 32] Heavens yes, toys! toys! toys! We have a special vibrator just for my husband. He likes various stimulation at various times and it is a fun way to play. He also has a couple of "masturbation sleeves" or whatever you like to call them. His favorite is one of a soft pink jelly material that keeps him company when i am away and joins us in play when the mood strikes. We also have vibrators for me, including my favorite waterproof blue jelly vibe. It is close in size to my husband and he likes to join me with it often. But the most favorite is the toy we enjoy together. It is a soft clear cockring with an attachment that a vibrating bullet fits into. It provides wonderful stimulation for both of us when we enjoy the woman on top position. If a woman ever wanted to be multiorgasmic this toy will get her there!

[F 26] - i love your books and i'd like to suggest this sex toy i found -- it's called the Tongue. it is so lifelike! i use it a lot when i'm masturbating (and my boyfriend loves it too -- when he's watching ;)
I've asked for more information about this delightful-sounding toy. I'll add when she writes again. JEL

A new question from one of my visitors.
I recently slipped my girlfriend a set of Ben Wa balls. They didn't realy have any instructions. Besides the obvious of where they go, how are they used? I had thought they could be left in for extended periods of time, like while cleaning the house or shopping. We, or rather she, sort of lost control of them while walking in a very public place. Help!?!?!?

I wrote back: I have never had any luck with Ben Wa balls. Personally I had a set, inserted them and felt nothing particularly arousing. Visitors - any reactions?

And here are lots of comments from other visitors about the toys they use. Please write about yours.

12/1/97 [M] My 36yr old blonde wife and I often (perhaps 80% of our lovemaking sessions) use a soft pink 8" dildo which has greatly enhanced our sex lives. This dildo is 2 inches longer and quite a bit thicker than I am. I think both of us imagine it is another lover without saying so...at least, I know I do. In the beginning I would start with oral sex, then the dildo and oral on her until she comes, then I hop on and usually quickly finish. Lately, though, I have been starting with oral on her, getting the dildo wet in her, then pulling it out and putting my cock in while rubbing the lubed dildo around her asshole. Although she does not currently want anal sex (she is very sexually reserved in all areas) this seems to be a big turn on as she usually has her biggest orgasms this way, and I am not pounding into her AFTER she has come, but simultaneous.
We own several other toys; I bought them all. She shows very little interest in them when I am around, but I wonder if she uses them when I am not around. I hope so. We have a flesh colored 12" doubled-headed dildo, an 18" and thick (too thick for her, I found) double-headed dildo, and a 7" dildo with a 3" and thin anal probe. As you might notice, I have visions of sex with my wife that take us towards bi-sex and anal fun; I believe she fantasizes about both (she loves to suck my nipples while I am stroking in and out of her) and the thoughts excite her. She does not and may never enjoy this in reality, but I enjoy gently moving us in that direction. If nothing else, I enjoy the thought of it, so it enhances our lovemaking. We do have a standard 7" vibrating dildo, but she does not seem to like it at all... more like a distraction. I own two french tickler cock rings, one which vibrates, but again these seem to do more for me than her, so we seldom use them.

[F] yes, we have played with several bedroom toys. I am a 22 year old female, enaged to a wonderful 25 year old man, and we are developing a wild sex life. We have always been good together, but we're experiementing. We have a vibrator for me, a strap-on I use on him, a riding crop used for dominatrix fantasies, honey dust (wonderful stuff... especially the feather duster!), and use ties that he no longer wears for bondage. If you're counting lingerie as a bedroom toy, I have several VERY kinky peices of leather lingerie, strappy nes from Frederick's of Hollywood, two pairs of 51/2" heels, black and red, and more. We have a dominatrix outfit on order currently, and a pair of thigh high leather boots with a 5" silver spike heel. We love it.

[F]This question might be easier if it was what toys have we not used.
We have a thin anal didlo, a regular sized dildo, a butt plug, and a plug-in type vibrator (the battery ones don't have enough oomph for my taste). About a year ago, I made a set of restraints for our bed. 2 wrist cuffs and 2 ankle cuffs (fur lined with adjustable strapping and quick release clips). They can attach to straps on the four corners of the bed or to each other in any configuration. I also have 10 yards of thick cotton rope (it is soft and doesn't chaffe) and a roll of plastic wrap. I keep a length of fairly thin cording for CBT, and a bag to hang from the cord to add weight. We have two sets of nipple clamps (I like the ones that tighten when pulled) and a package of clothes pins. Our toy box also has a length of red silk to use as a blindfold or as skin stimulation. On the subject of skin stimulation, we have a fur mitt, a long feather, and a selection of spanking items: a wooden slat, a 4-ply length of strapping, and a flyswatter covered on one side with sheep's wool and the other with leather. I like the wooden slat the best. It makes a wonderful sound.
Of course, our toy box wouldn't be complete without our books. We have all of yours. We have a couple of Anne Hooper's, several of Nancy Friday's and other miscellaneous ones (I really like The Loving Dominant).

11/09/97 [F] I am a woman in my forties. I am in a relationship with a sweet, loving man also in his forties. His business causes him to travel much of the time. Since I also work, I can't go along so we do what we can online and by phone. For the first time, I bought a vibrator which we use while on the phone. We both lie in bed and describe everything for the other...lighting, position, music, etc. I tell him what I would be doing to him (in great detail) and he tells me exactly how and where to use the vibrator. It's very erotic and my orgasms are pretty intense while using the vibrator and hearing his soft, sensuous voice in my ear. Somehow, the use of that vibrator seems to make our time "together" on the phone much more intimate. We love it.

[M] My wife and I have only tried a couple of things. A small vibrator, which I love to use on her, or watch her use on herself and bring herself to orgasm. We have also used a balloon, the long thin kind, slightly filled with water. It works a little like a dildo, but I can also squeeze and release the part that is outside of her, which forces the water in and out!

[F] I have never even owned a vibrator or anything like that. But, the thought of using one, or a dildo with my husband really turns me on. I like his size, and he is a great lover, he can hold back and wait for me for hours! But I would like to buy one of those really big dildoes, and let him use it on me. I have had a baby, a 9lb 5 oz one, and I am little roomier than before. To have something big and yummy in me makes me all wet! I want to have that feeling again.

[M] I am a 26 year old male and sometimes I pack a "kit" for the bedroom. It has three of my favorite compact discs, some personal lublicant (I am using WET PLATINUM, which works just wonderfully), two scarfs which works for blinds, ties, etc. I also have a to-go menu for a restuarant that is not too far inside the kit.
And he adds If you brush your teeth and perform oral sex afterwards, your partner would have a wonderful reaction. And I heard Pepsodent has quite a following. Almost cult-like among the scene.

[F] I am female and in my 30's and just found that playing with toys is the most exciting new way to spice up your fun with your partner. My slave, a male, got me interested in toys and likes when I strap on a dildo. I found tiny little ones as well as a big one - at least 6 inches of pink fun. The little on is just as fun and the big ones. Also, cock rings, the rubber kind (so it's not as dangerous as the metal ones) is fun too. Good ones are by Doc Johnson. Great quality and easy to clean.

[F] Oh Yes.......I have my toys, my hubby has his and we have ours!! Now thats unusual in the minds of a lot of our friends!! By the way......I am female, 40 years old.
My favorite two toys are the Scorpion, and Jack Rabbit. The Scorpion......a nice little number that has dual vibrators and clitoral stimulators (antenna looking things) It has a set of elastic straps so it can be held in place with out the use of the hands......or for the more adventurous, be worn under clothing!! One vibrator is under the body of the scorpion where it would burrows into the vagina. The other vibrator is on the end of the tail which snaps back like a real scorpion and is used anally. Stand back after a few minutes of this toy!! I use this one when hubby is gone to work and I need some relief from the usual grind of the day!! Jack Rabbit ......equally proud to own this one. It also has clitoral stimulators, but also has a rotating shaft that is filled with little beads that move and grind around each other......The actions send me flying in many directions at once. I am sending the hyperlink for some of the toys that my hubby has that we use or he uses.......Enjoy Pro Cock - American Jock and Touch Down

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