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Keeping Long Term Relationships Alive
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Updated 2/07 [M] I've been married to the same woman for over 30 years. During most of this time together as far as sex goes, sexual intercourse was our most often performed act. But, sure wasn't limited to intercourse. We also practiced mutual masturbation on each other quite a bit. And, although my wife never did like performing oral on me, she did occasionally and always with the understanding that I wouldn't ejaculate in her mouth as much as I wanted to. I honored her wishes and she'd take me to almost there and then would take me over the top with her wonderful feeling hand. I, on the other hand, loved performing oral on her and did this quite often. As we've aged and in particular as she had health concerns involving her vagina, intercourse quickly slowed down. We then, like today, had to change our method of satisfying each other. I would most often go the oral route on her and she would go the masturbation route (hand job) on me. This is where we are today although she no longer craves to have sex or orgasms. But, I sure still crave this! And as long as her wonderful hand works and as long as the feel of her inner thighs feel as good as they always have to me I have no complaints. She still gets me aroused just like always. Sometimes I'll just see her in the living room when her skirt or nighty has slid up her thighs some. This is always good for getting me highly sexually aroused. She'll sense this and it isn't long before I feel her hand between my legs fondling me there. I'll always end up with a ragging erection from this. She'll them lube up her hand, take my penis in it and stroke it against the softness of her fantastic feeling inner thighs while I feel them with my hands. I've never fail to end up covering her thigh I'm against with a load of my semen. I'll admit that I do miss the feeling of being deep inside her vagina with my penis but I also am a realist. I also have a good memory of those hundreds if not thousands of times I did get the feeling of being deep inside her fantastic feeling pussy and of all the semen I had the pleasure of pumping into it.
Updated 8/06 [M] Assuming that a couple has a vibrant and otherwise healthy sex life to begin with, the sky's the limit when it comes to putting spice in the relationship. In no particular order, here are some suggestions from a long term couple:
-If you enjoy erotica (books, magazines, videos) or accessories (lingerie, hats, gloves, shoes), take a trip to a good adult store.
-Go to the adult section of a large book store, pick out something that looks interesting (recommending anything from the Herotica series). Read stories to one another in the bath/ spa, or in front of a fire.
-Do a photo shoot. Wooded areas with hiking trails are nice. One can usually find a quiet, private spot.
-Make up some note cards with sexual themes on them. Draw from the deck and assign them to a day in the month.
-Rent a theme suite for a night; there are plenty of them around the country.
Updated 6/06 [M] Like so many older men, I had prostate surgery to improve urination twice, once at age 47 and again at age 66. The last one changed two things that made sex better. After the last procedure, I received two benefits: 1. My orgasms are much longer and more intense. Sometimes I yell so loud my wife is embarrassed that the neighbors may hear through the walls. 2. I no longer ejaculate. There is no mess for my wife to clean up. The doctors said that scar tissue redirected semen into the bladder. Hoorah for great sex without the mess.
Updated 10/05 [M 49] I came across your site and felt compelled to share my view point of older sex. I apologize if I have gone about it the incorrect way, your site that is but, I am in hopes that you will understand the reason for my content. I am a 49 year old male and am married to a 53 year old female. I might add that any and all marriages suffer a bit from time-to-time and that does not necessarily mean sex.
I am crazy about my wife and all that she does. She is a Special Education teacher for our local schooling system and I own a building contracting business, as well as, I am an Instructor for the local public school system teaching Adult and Community Education, and, Instructing Construction Apprenticeship for the state in which I reside. We have three children. Two of which are in college and one just finishing up high school. My point is that we are very versed in education and the service business. To mention, we are a blended family meaning that our three children come from our prior marriages. In short, raising children is difficult enough but when you add in dealing with ex-spouses, well, it has been trying over the years. That's OK.
Now that I have given the basic nuts and bolts, let me now move on to my real purpose of contacting you. I am hoping that you will take my writing and slice and dice it anyway that you feel fit and post what is left of your website under some category. Remember our ages, 49 & 53 respectfully. I will continue in the paragraph(s) that sex is what you make it.
My wife and I have always had an incredible appetite for each other in the bedroom. My wife came into menopause about 5 years ago, a little ahead of schedule based on the average. I actually noticed it before she did. Once diagnosed she became a bit depressed as any woman would feel. As time went on I noticed a slight change in her sexual desire -- I never complained or blamed anything. She actually started believing that she was less of a partner (in bed). I ferociously began and continued to read everything that I could about "the change." Let me say this to any male partner going through this to NEVER make fun of it or discount what your partner is going through -- you will regret it. I never did have to worry about that at all as I have a strong effeminate side.
Anyway, I over and above of educating myself to the change began to use my intuition and decided to take a different approach on sexuality between the two of us. I felt it was my responsibility to do so at this juncture. I knew that my partners body wasn't reacting as it use to so that was the basis in which I began to work from.
I started looking and shopping for sexy lingerie. I not only looked for items that were romantic, I also began ordering very erotic playful wear. I just didn't just give it to her, I made it a happening. For example, I would start 14 days before Valentine's Day and every morning after she went off to work I would leave a pink bag on her pillow that contained a personalized note from me with a selection of erotic wear. After the 14 days were up, on Valentine's Day, I took her to dinner and presented her with pearls. Please excuse my frankness but I she made me beg for death in the bedroom that night. I never realized that she could do the things that she did and to the areas that she did them to.
I have always enjoyed giving oral pleasure to her but I have found that because of my actions and understanding's to what is going on that I have stepped up my oral delivery two fold. She's not complaining. Actually the only complaint that I hear from her is that she reaches climax way to early. I solved that as well by tickling her inner thighs with my tongue and then playing with her vagina lips before my tongue runs up and down her love crevice and occasionally borring it as far as possible into her. I have made her feel like such a desired woman again that I have to be careful not to flick and suck on her clitoris until I have pleased her to the point of exploding. At this point she erupts with very lubricated pleasure.
As a result of my desire to please her, she has developed that very special technique of taking my rock hard penis all the way into her mouth, right down to the root, and then when I am right at the point of explosion, she orally tells me where she wants my ejaculate to be released. I have never and will never ask her to swallow, at all. She does let me blow into her mouth, on her face, all over her breast and if I am behind her (doggie style) she has me pull out and soak the crack between her ass cheeks.
Just recently, she is now involved with the shopping and purchase of erotic outfits and is now leaning towards leather. She has always worn thigh highs and garter belts with fuck-me pumps. We are shopping now for 6-7 inch platforms, at her request, so that -- in her words -- can get her ass up high enough while standing and turned around so that my hard cock will slide comfortably into her backside. I am a very, very lucky man. All because I took the time to understand my wife's change of life. I made her feel like a total woman again.
Oh, I should add that she now goes to dinner with no panties on. Do you know what it is like to be sitting in a very nice restaurant knowing that your wife has all of the normal clothing attire with the exception of panties? All I want to do is to go under the table and using my tongue, to probe around with my tongue and get her to cum right at the table. It's even harder, no pun, to be in the car and know that she now wearing anything under her skirt. We bought one of those fun cars to tool around in (Thunderbird) and no room to play.
Well, all I can say to those husbands that just don't get what their wife's are going through is to treat them like a lady, make them feel like a lady, talk to them like a lady, supply the needs of a lady, put that lady before yourself, show them that they are a lady and If you do that, I can pretty much assure you that your dick will be sucked by that repressed slutty side of that lady.
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